It’s now 3:32 in the afternoon and I’m sitting alone, thinking about my life in fulltime ministry. My church, Bible Teachers International, is celebrating another year since the launch of our television network. For some reason, this summer feels very much like the one that got me into this ministry life. Maybe it's because I have come to a point where I'm ready to either start over, or give up completely. Only God knows which it will be.
I started out very passionate about the network. Our ideas nor our equipment didn't always work, but we had the backing of the entire ministry. As Director of the network, I had inherited an infectious zeal that would inspire people to work long hours; this I got from our founder, Apostle Mary Banks. But as the ministry evolved, the focus of many shifted from the network into other areas of ministry. Some lost their fire for God, others went on to bigger responsibilities, and I embarked on the most lonely season of my life.
In this season, I've been learning that everyone was chosen by God for a specific role in advancing His kingdom. There are times when your role might include someone else, and vice versa. But we must become accustomed to obeying the conviction that God has given to us - even if no one else has the same conviction. I don't know what you do for God, how you work for Him, or when, but if God told you to do something - keep doing it until He says stop.