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The Necessary Elements of an Apology

“I am sorry” are 3 of the simplest words a person can form with their mouth, yet ironically, many find it extremely difficult to do just that. If we are not able to apologize righteously to God and man, God will sever His fellowship with us. Follow us on this journey as we peruse God’s mind concerning apologies and repentance.

The Elements of An Apology

In preparation to minister this topic the Lord took me to this scripture.

2 Corinthians 7:9-11 KJVS

[9] Now I rejoice, not that ye were made sorry, but that ye sorrowed to repentance: for ye were made sorry after a godly manner, that ye might receive damage by us in nothing. [10] For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death. [11] For behold this selfsame thing, that ye sorrowed after a godly sort, what carefulness it wrought in you, yea, what clearing of yourselves, yea, what indignation, yea, what fear, yea, what vehement desire, yea, what zeal, yea, what revenge! In all things ye have approved yourselves to be clear in this matter.

When He spoke the above scripture to me, He said, “Godly sorrow is a heart posture that should not only be towards me, but unto your fellow brethren too. There is a godly way to be sorry. In Godly Sorrow you will find all the necessary elements of an apology.”

CAREFULNESS = earnestness and authentic concern. Judge how do you really feel about the fact that you have done wrong or need to apologize. Is it an authentic emotion of sorrow that stems from hurting your brother? Or is your apology just to appease the moment?

CLEARING OF YOURSELVES = vindication of yourselves [against charges that you tolerate sin or enjoy the offense you have laid.] To clear oneself they must outdo their wrongs with righteous deeds. An apology is the first step, however it must be followed up, if possible, by deeds that can undo or reverse the damage done. Your humility must outdo the pride of your wrongdoings (Rom 5:20).

INDIGNATION = intense rage at your sin or at the fact that there is a rift between you and your fellow man. This rage will motivate you to do whatever is necessary to restore fellowship with you and your brother.

FEAR = The fear of the Lord. The fear of offending God. The fear of the Lord comes from an awareness that God is judging the hearts in the matter. Is there any darkness of any kind in you? Even if you were right, do you entertain darkness by being satisfied with disunity between you and your brother. The fear of the Lord will cause you to move to humility in the site of the Lord and to fight for restoration, so that you might be blameless in His eyes.

VEHEMENT DESIRE = a longing [for righteousness and justice]. This is a strong desire to do the righteous thing and a strong desire to have love flow between parties again. Once again, this desire serves as motivation, for you to do anything in your power to have love flowing again.

ZEAL = passion [to do what is right]. If we still have not done what is right we still have not apologized. Passion comes from the heart, and it ignores the humiliation of being wrong. Instead it focuses on what is needed to fulfill righteousness. It ignores the consequences that might come as a result of righteousness. It’s only desired reward is the righteousness itself.

REVENGE = a heart to undo the wrong you have done by superseding it with righteousness and good deeds. If you could take it back you would. Is it in your power to settle the situation. Could you say or do anything (that’s not sin) to cause the whole thing to be quashed? Do whatever it takes!

Revenge also refers to the disposition of the heart after the apology, it is when one decides that they will never do the same mistake again.

Look our for more teachings on apologies.

We did a Live Show based on this Sunrise. Check it out below.



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